He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
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