Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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