even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize