so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
