I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Randomize
