Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
