I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
i would punch a child for taco bell
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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