i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
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