okay pat passed out under dana's car
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
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