Little spoons don't ask big questions
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
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