Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
wat bout pragnant strippers??
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
