Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
Randomize
