i don't like sucking hair
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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