I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
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