Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
