im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
