my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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