don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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