some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
So wait. Let me get this straight lol... you... are are considering offering fetish services to "trample and own" someone for $80 in order to pay for someone to come organize ur shit? Pure genius.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
