I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
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