M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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