I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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