i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
You peed on a flamingo?!?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize