Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
