haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
