Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Someone shit on the floor
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
Randomize
