Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I don't care if there's a party or not. I just want to be half naked in a cape with a never-ending supply of alcohol within arm's length at all times. Make it happen.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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