Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
