Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize