Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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