I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize