If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
i dont even know how to be here
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
