Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
Randomize
