So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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