What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
