Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
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