don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Stop it with the monkey emojis. It's like sexting with Curious George
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Randomize
