just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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