Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
