Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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