Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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