Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Randomize
