I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize