I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
