That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
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