You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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