No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
How does it feel to date your dad?
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
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