I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
