Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Just wanted to let you know it's 3am and, at this point, I believe your sister has more of my semen in her than I do. So suck on that, fuckface.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
