I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
